I, 35
December 12, 2007 :: Link :: Journal
Today I am 35.
Sometimes I wonder how old I will be when I stop appreciating birthdays. I think it will probably be the same age I am when I stop appreciating jokes about farts and buttholes, which is to say about 250 years old.
Despite what they insinuate on TV, being in your 30s is fantastic for many reasons, but the thing I like most is what I like to think of as the Three Principals of Bullshit Reduction.
1. More than ever before in your life, you are able to recognize bullshit for what it is.
2. Upon seeing bullshit, you are old enough to have the courage to say, "This is bullshit."
3. You then avoid said bullshit, politely if possible, but not necessarily. Bullshit does not require politeness.
There's no way of knowing for sure, of course, but I'm willing to predict that by the time you reach 70 or 80, all willingness to endure any kind of bullshit is completely erased. Or rather, the bullshit just washes over you in a brown wave, then beads up and drips off just like in those old commercials for Turtle Wax. Or at least, I can only hope that's the case.
Throughout life, the BS just keeps getting thicker and thicker. And any sane person will tell you that there's no way to avoid it.
Attitude. That's the secret of life.
Comments
Happy Birthday!
What are you going to do now that you are inching towards 40?
Posted by: jed | December 12, 2007 2:41 PM
Happy 35!
A question or two: Can I freely incorporate the Principals of Bullshit Reduction into my own life, or do I need to send $19.95 for the DVD?
And, is your PBR in any way affiliated with PBR, the beverage?
I'll go now, thank you.
Posted by: Whiskeymarie | December 12, 2007 3:59 PM
Happy Birthday!
Posted by: Beverly | December 12, 2007 8:12 PM
Happy Birthday! I'll be 35 on Groundhog's Day and I was just discussing this same theory with my husband. The older I get the less I care what people think of me and more I'm apt to call people on their BS. We always look at older people as crotchety, but now I can see that they're really just not into putting up with everyone's crap. I can admire that.
Posted by: Beret | December 13, 2007 10:33 AM
I sure hope you're throwing the BS Flag on last night's finale of Kid Nation. Mike, Jared and Anjay get no recognition?!?!
Posted by: cork1 | December 13, 2007 11:13 AM
Happy birthday, and many happy returns!
Posted by: ceecee | December 13, 2007 2:27 PM
i'd like to recognize mike for "most likely to overdose on his inhaler"; jared for "most likely to start a prostitution ring that features migle"; anjay for "creepiest loss of virginity at age 38."
Posted by: christa | December 13, 2007 2:28 PM
Mike just would have blown the $50K on Rolaids after his inevitable ulcer kicked in. Anjay would have told his parents he was away at college, but actually would have been holed up in a tenement hotel, cuddling a $50K RealDoll and whimpering "I just don't understand girls," over and over.
Jared would have gotten a scholarship to college, and blown it and the $50K in Vegas on his 18th birthday..."Blackjack, baby!"
Posted by: Barrett | December 13, 2007 11:25 PM
kid nation fan fiction.
Posted by: christa | December 13, 2007 11:50 PM